Film producer Surya Pratap is in final stages of negotiations with Pryceless to pen the title track in his upcoming movie ‘The Final Call’ which is based on the theme of father-son relationships.

The producer has already approached Sanjay Dutt for the lead role and the actor is learned to have expressed his interest but is yet to give his final nod. 

Similarly, Pryceless is rumored to be in talks about a collaboration with steamy songstress 'Shakira' for an additional track for the flick, and he has reportedly agreed in principal. 

Only legalities on paper need to be done for him to be an official part of the film. 

"I said if they let me shag the daylights out of that monkey woman I'm up for anything" P-Less belched just before a drunken brawl broke out during a London charity event for underprivileged children.

Nick Cave will be Pryce's special guest next Thursday (April 8) at the first night of the Mini-Meltdown Festival at London SE1 Royal Festival Hall Purcell Rooms, the three day event organised by Mute Records boss Daniel Miller.

There's nothing I can say about these two that hasn't been laid out in the court transcripts, there's no use denying it, they're just dirty old men said Miller.

Not a piss soaked wino laying in his own vomit dirty ... more Pee-Wee Herman jerking off in a Gay cinema dirty, "not that there's anything wrong with that".

OK! So one of them is a piss soaked dirty twat [can you guess which one?].

It's rumored that the guitar rig secretly under construction for the 2010 'Pryceless Fucks The World' tour will consume the entire 10 - 11 production output of Marshall Amplification as well as sizable contributions from Ampeg, Vox, Fender, Hiwatt and Orange.

Structural Engineers are warning this configuration could theoretically produce sound pressure levels in excess of 10, 000db and will be capable of disintegrating matter at a molecular level. 

Scientists from NASA and CERN are protesting any attempt to build a guitar rig with the potential to overcome the limitation of spacial vacuum and potentially warp spacetime. 

In an online blog Pryceless recently boasted: "AC/DC had a really big bell, now I have this fucking huge amp stack" so get fucked Grandma.

Music lovers everywhere will be relieved to hear that Pryceless will soon be back behind the ivories [if he can't find any ivory he'll kill the elephant himself] for an unspecified period beginning immediately.

Local Musicians and Trade Unions today won a High Court injunction to stop Pryce playing guitar for the remainder of 2009 in a landmark decision in support of acceptable standards in popular music and in the interest of occupational health and safety. 

Pryceless Management released a brief statement declaring: if they don't like the way Pryce plays guitar they can fuck off ...

Due to last week's bizarre Grammy Awards fiasco involving balaclavas and unregistered handguns the troubled star and his security entourage have been banned from any future industry award ceremonies within US borders.

A minor incident involving a fan rushing forward for an autograph, ended in an orgy of violence involving nunchucks, brass knuckles, pepper spray, tasers and handguns. So far Pryceless security staff are remaining silent about their employers personal involvement in the affray. 

Although pundits are predicting that with the huge sums being touted by magazines for the first Pryceless tell-all, "it's just a matter of time before a management insider spills their guts". 

Police haven't yet laid official charges, but reports are that after scrutinizing security footage to ascertain the identity of a balaclava clad man who pistol whipped two paparazzi, they are anxious to interview Pryceless who attended the Awards disguised as a gun wielding terrorist to promote his Blow me like an IED Greatest Hits album.

Pryceless is busy recording what many believe could be the most dangerous album ever conceived.

 In a cynical and derivatively Enoesque 'producorial hommage' Pryceless has chained himself in a foetal position to a studio sofa while random headphone mixes bombard his skull at planet shattering volumes of +/- 10,000 db. 

He intends to allow this process to continue through to it's logical conclusion [he's brutally beaten to death by studio crew or suffers the inevitable fatal brain hemorrhage] at which time engineers will sample his last agonized screams for mercy. 

Pryceless and an 'yet unnamed' record company plan to release the limited edition EP titled "Hey Dickhead Give Me Your Cash Then Fuck Off"  direct to the internet in a dead language encoded as 8 bit mp3 files.

"A tasteless combination of Glam, Pop Rock and Industrial Electronica"

Certain songs on "Some Mad Dogs Must Die" sound as if they could crackle away happily on an old Edison Cylinder with the likes of Mario Lanza, The Dorsey Brothers and Al Jolson. 

In stark contrast other included audio outings boast a more 70's punk rock sound, in particular tracks like “Skid Mark Love” and the romantic ballad “Eat Shit Motherfucker” are just gagging for high rotation on your typical FM college party station. 

Rumors have reached this writer that the amplification equipment Pryceless is planning to utilize in recording this record pose a serious threat to human life, not a distant departure from his much maligned 'chainsaw/handgun' technique used to such great effect on Pop Filth and Self Abuse. 

Long time fans are debating whether or not 'The Serpent' will continue his now famous 'bong licking, toad smoking' antics that have made his previous recording sessions infamous among industry insiders. 

One thing for certain on a Pryceless record, toads will die, blood will flow, and someone or something innocent will end up riddled with heavy ammunition.

Admitting to Pryceless he was shocked to see the condition in which he found former rock idols The Rolling Stones [suggestions have been made he was actually vomiting because he'd stolen their entire drug stash and done it all in one go] .

"It was fucking pitiful" he  exclaimed, Mick was paying for sex, Keith was banging up low fat coffee whitener, Charlie was chugging down Mexican cough mixture.

And Ron, well honestly! Who gives a fuck about Ron.

Pryceless went on to admit "I'm a hard man, but it was so fucking depressing I almost bashed their heads in with a bar stool".

Pryceless and his management are planning a series of benefit concerts around the world to support fat old rockers who've fallen on hard times.

In a recent press release Pryceless offered: "It probably too late to resurrect hopeless losers like Aerosmith, Van Halen and those C%&$# Metallica.

But there may be still enough time to save old farts like The Stones from a fatal chair bashing".